As a Wizards fan, it’s very rare for me to find someone on the sports misery index who I truly believe has it worse than me. The Wizards stink and have always stunk. They’ll probably always stink, too, as last week’s NBA Draft lottery has demonstrated to us.
But I’m not going to lie to you. Leafs fans? Y’all might have me beat.
The Toronto Maple Leafs lost another Game 7 on Sunday night to the Panthers. Not only did the Leafs lose, but they got destroyed 6-1. The game was over after that quick burst from Florida in the second period. Toronto didn’t stand a chance.
When I say Toronto didn’t stand a chance, I don’t mean against Florida. Ordinarily, those Maple Leafs could absolutely beat the Panthers. Instead, what Toronto didn’t stand a chance against was history. The Leafs were always going to blow this game. There was waaaaaay too much stink involved all around for Toronto to get it done.
This was a Game 7, man. The last time the Maple Leafs won a Game 7 was in 2004. Usher’s “Confessions” was the No. 1 song on the Billboard 200. The Marvel Cinematic Universe didn’t exist. Neither did your iPhone. Some of you reading this probably weren’t even born.
More than two decades have passed. Since then, the Leafs have lost six straight game 7s, including Sunday night’s loss. At this point, it feels like we’ll get a President’s Trophy winner taking home the Stanley Cup again before we get a Leafs Game 7 win. At least this time, the loss was in the second round and not the first. That’s progress! Fans should probably be thankful it was over quickly and not simply some agonizing heartbreaker of a game.
LEAFS FANS ARE DONE:They threw beers and jerseys on the ice after the loss.
Leafs fans, I don’t really know what to tell you. My favorite team sucks, but at least I don’t get the delusions of grandeur that come with playing in a Game 7. You always believe your squad has a chance because it’s one game! Any team can win one game. But nah. Not your team. Your team is doomed, for whatever reason.
I’m sorry. I feel for you. One day, this will end, as all sports curses do no matter how long they take. Unfortunately, today is not that day.
Scottie is back on top
Last year’s PGA Championship was all about Scottie Scheffler’s arrest at Valhalla Golf Club in Louisville. He didn’t win it, but the fact that he competed at all after being detained was just an unreal sequence of events.
This year? Sheffler won it all. This PGA Championship win is his third major title and his first since his arrest last year. He got off a well-deserved Gronk-style hat spike after finishing up the tournament.
For the first time in a long time, golf does seem to finally have that guy again. Not only did Scheffler win here, but he dominated. He won by five strokes. There was never a doubt that it’d be him in the end, even if the trophy did slip out of his hands at least once.
I won’t call him Tiger Woods or Jack Nicklaus just yet. But I will point out that, at 28 years old, Scheffler joins those two as the only three players in PGA history to win 15 PGA tour titles before 29 years old, per Golfweek. The trajectory that Scottie is on seems very clear at this point.
We’ll see how the rest of the summer goes for him.
Really big rings
The New York Liberty played their first game of the season against the Las Vegas Aces and absolutely dominated. Once again, New York looks like the best team in the WNBA.
But less on that and more on these gaudy championship rings. SHEESH, guys.
These are legitimately some of the best rings I’ve ever seen. How fun, New York.
